Wednesday, 13 January 2010

Why does it feel like a friday?

It's snowing again? What's up with that. This is England. We have like... a days worth of snow a year.

On the upside I am currently listening to songs from Glee on Spotify and LOVING IT. Oh and Jason Mraz. also loving it. Ha ha!

I'm in a weird mood. I'm kind of sad but I don't know why, I'm kind of annoyed and I don't know why and I'm kind of contemplative and I don't know why.

The snow is doing weird things to me. I can't sleep, I'm moody, I cried yesterday for absolutely NO reason and I'm feeling boxed in. I'm in a creative rut and I want to write something good. I want to sing and have an audience, I want to do something and get somewhere and succeed and not be stuck in this house looking out at the endless white for another week. I want support. I want love. I want security.

I want to stop being such a basket case. Because most of the problems I have I bring on myself.

I want to stop doubting myself and doubting those around me. I want to be strong enough to trust someone. I want the voice in my head to fuck off for once and not make me always assume the worst.

But then again, "I want" doesn't get.

I want you to txt me back so I can stop worrying you're angry at me.

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